Saturday 9 January 2016

Rage against the machine

They tell me that I should want to buy a flat or a house. They tell me to want to get a driving license finally and to buy a car...to want to go to holiday resorts...to buy expensive clothes...to look feminine and sexy for men to like me...to get a good management job just because I did this useless succeed-in-the-fucking-corporate-world degree...or to want to have that kind of job just because supposedly I am capable of it. They tell me - that would be such a waste if you didn`t. You owe it to yourself, you were always one of the best students. Make your family proud...

Fuck you, I won`t do what you tell me.

Just because...renting a room with my friends in the beautiful Barcelona is romantic.  In winter it would be a cold flat with shaky windows and wind coming through when we are drinking ginger tea, in summer - hot and humid with lots of books and dust on the shelves.

...because I like to walk the pavements of Gaudí for hours, not even taking the metro.

...because going with my mate on a short trip to hike the Pyrenees or  couchsurfing somewhere makes my life so vibrant and authentic. Feels like I am learning.

...because I prefer going to a second hand or vintage store to buy clothes  that had a life and will give me a character and colours.

...because I don`t like showing my skin to anyone apart from the one who makes me feel desire when he touches me with his warm hands.

...because I want to have a small job that leaves me with the energy to feel, love, laugh and WANT after my working day.

...because I don`t want to feel that greed for money and for buying and accumulating crap. Because for me not having much is comfortable and peaceful.

...because I want to sit on a sunny terrace sipping Spanish red wine not worrying about my next promotion.

...because sometimes it`s enough going to go to a free concert on Tuesday night or having a picnic with my friends by the sea on Sunday.

...because I have the right to do what I feel and use or not use my skills the way I want.

Is it too much to ask for people not to judge me and leave me alone?

More importantly, is it too much to ask it from myself and stop judging my own choices?!!

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